Bear's Den: "Family Fighting - is a 'Relative' Thing"

Boy, the holidays are supposed to be all about family togetherness. But I´ll tell ya what – it doesn´t always seem that way. I mean, whenever kinfolk get together, regardless of the occasion… there´s gonna be some spats. You can count on there being some squabbles because a big part of family… is the individual differences between us. Um-hmm, being separate and still ´relative´ is what gives a family that special cohesion, and that´s… the truth about it.

Now, for those of ya´all who don´t know, our Rez is a ways off the beaten track. It´s nestled on the boundaries of the Manistee National Forest here in Northwest Michigan. To begin with, the town of Hart, itself, is small and just outside its border; you delve into miles of cherry orchards, farm and deeply wooded lands. A few years back, a good-sized bear was hit by a car, just outside its limits, while running with another. Our little log shack is a good ½ mile off the county road, and thus, the Rez is one of those very unique places where you´re only a couple of miles from the downtown county seat and yet… deep in the heart of the wildland. We don´t have a neighbor closer than a mile away, and that´s through high rolling hills covered by dense timber, crisscrossing streams and a lake jacketing one full side. So, we´re spared the fright of both trick-or-treaters and Jehovah´s Witnesses, alike. And man, we have a plethora of wildlife here – you name it and we´ve likely got it – otters, deer, fox, coyotes, bald eagles and… owls and turkeys. Yessir, and it´s the last two that got me to pondering these family skirmishes, too.

Our room is on the second floor and there´s a big deck off from it, which overlooks the lake between the trees. The other night after we went to bed, as has always been her habit, my domestic boss whipped out her cross-cut and began immediately sawing logs. Yep, and as is my ritual, I popped open a book and began to read a bit. About five minutes later, the angry chorus began. There were owls making a ruckus, and one was just outside the window, perched on the deck post. Another was close by. And, the final one, a snow owl, by the sounds of him, was way down by the lake. There was a family spat going on because the hoot owls didn´t cotton to the snowy dude invading their turf. I went to sleep with ´whoo-hooing´ still going on, hot & heavy. I knew that they would eventually work out their differences because heck... they´re still family, even if they had this little disagreement.

Then the other night, I had to take old Fido out for his evening constitutional. As we went out the door and made our way over to where the small marsh which constitutes his porta-potty sets, we spooked two turkeys that had roosted in the trees above. While Hershey began searching for just the right place to leave his hefty deposit, I looked up into the black sky at the calamity of the turkeys taking flight. I recalled seeing four of them, one time, chasing a ruffed grouse through the woods that they didn´t want hanging out in their feeding grounds. Those big birds had been in ´fowl´ mood but I knew that, eventually, the grouse and turkeys would come to an agreement over the issue because shoot… birds of any feather, may not always flock together, but family, is still family. Uh-huh, then I remembered the owls from the night before and marveled at the family bickering that is evident in all manner of the Great Mystery's creations. And it was at about this time, that I began having difficulty controlling the dog´s leash.

Being an Alpha male, it seems to be vital to Hershey, that he leave his deposit in just… the right place. This takes some serious consideration by him and it usually means the two-legged holding his leash will be drug hither and yon while he searches for that unique locale. Now, this male chocolate lab is probably the most confident dog I´ve ever known. He runs 80lbs, and, like all the other hounds we´ve had… he´s family. Yet, being a very independent male, he likes to do things his way. And, I´m kind´a selfish that way, too, especially when it comes to… having to wade through 3 feet of snow while he searches for the primo depository. Where all the rest of the family will cow-tow to his wants – I won´t – and where he can often drag one of the girls around… I´m a fat boy and it´s not that easy for him when I have the reins. So, he finally accepted this and did his duty in the only place available. Yep, and that reminded me of the day before.

We had to take the Jeep for our daily walk and Hershey was going to have to lie on the floor, in a more confined spot than the back of the truck where he usually rides. He didn´t like this – it made him nervous. So, when I told him to lie down – he growled at me. I didn´t like that, so I punched him in the side of the head. I told him again and he growled once more, and again, I popped him. But after that, the testosterone spat was over and he lay down. Uh-huh, and the two of us, along with the Leukemia Kid, made our daily walk on the Rail Trail. Of course, he had a headache and I had sore knuckles but there you go. Being separate and still ´relative´ is what gives a family that special cohesion, and that´s… the truth about it.