Married With Children In A Job That You Hate And You´re Told That You Have Cancer…
Dr. Paul Lanthois
November 12, 2008
Imagine you are 53-year-old middle-class married man with 3 children. You have spent most of your working life in a job that you haven´t really enjoyed. Life had become that busy you had forgotten to look after yourself like you knew you should and you have become substantially overweight. You then visit the doctor and discover that you have cancer. You have a family to support. What do you do?
I spend a lot of my week researching ways for the Work Life Balance Foundation to help improve health, energy and stress relief in the workplace and to get a healthier work life balance. When researching I place a lot more credence on actual real-life experience rather than relying on a lot of academic and bureaucratic advice that rarely seems to relate to our everyday lives. This is why when I met Steve Symonds and heard his incredible story of how he is successfully turning his health, work and work life balance around I said to him, "People have to got hear about this."
So what is so special about Steve´s story?
It represents a common predicament that many middle-aged workers find themselves in after years of slaving away in jobs we don´t necessarily like and not looking after ourselves the way we ought to. More importantly Steve shares in the interview with the Work Life Balance Foundation how he is successfully making the transition to creating a healthier, happier and more balanced working individual. And to me Steve is your real-life work life balance expert…
Work Life Balance Foundation: So Steve, what does having an ideal work life balance mean to you?
Steve: Ideal work life is being happy in what you are doing and that you are working in a stress fee environment. Your life is much happier and your family is happier. You tend to live longer and can cope with life better.
Work Life Balance Foundation: Why don´t we have the kind of work life balance that we really want?
Steve: We as adults tend to work in any job that comes along and we stay in that job even if we don´t like it. We as parents have to work to support our family so and with the economy that we live in.
Work Life Balance Foundation: Why do you think it´s important for people in to have a good work life balance?
Steve: Our bodies and our minds can cope with the day-to-day stresses and still have enough in the tank for when you get home after work, which makes for a happy family life.
Work Life Balance Foundation: What´s the one thing that you do that helps give you a good work life balance?
Steve: Keeping fit and active, going to the doctor and have regular check ups. Keeping your body in good shape. Learning new things each day.
Work Life Balance Foundation: If you were to give one piece of advice on improving someone´s work life balance, what would it be?
Steve: Start going to the gym and keep your body in good shape and find the right job.
Work Life Balance Foundation: What do you wish you had learned earlier about improving your work life balance?
Steve: Finding the right job that I would enjoy and to make a difference to somebody else.
Work Life Balance Foundation: Is there any other things that you have learnt from your own experience that you think people should know?
Steve: With my life this year I had to make some big decisions. I had the choice of staying sick and have no motivation to enjoy life or I had the choice to move on and get well.
When I made the decision to get well I made sure that I kept the decision that in front of me at all times.
Work Life Balance Foundation: What do you mean by "keeping the decision in front of you"?
Steve: I´m a fairly self-motivated person so it meant that I stopped focusing on the past and the problems I had and I started focusing on getting well and looked forward to the future?
Work Life Balance Foundation: What motivated you to make the decision to get well?
Steve: Two things. I did look a bit back to the past. I remembered that my Dad died at the age of 65. And secondly I have a young family and I´m looking forward to being a Dad and to becoming a grandfather one day.
Work Life Balance Foundation: To get motivated we often talk about asking ourselves two questions:
"What pain will I or others experience if I keep doing what I´m doing?"
And you saw your Dad dying young and focused on the pain of your children growing up without their father.
And secondly: "What important and fulfilling thing will result if I take the action that I need?" And there you focused on your future on the joys of being a father and a grandfather.
So what other things has your experience taught you?
Steve: How important it is to get my body in good shape. This is by going to the doctor first and getting checked out. Then listen to what the doctor is saying and follow his instructions.
I have found a good gym; I have a personal trainer to motivate me. I have a trainer once a week and I go to gym at lest 3 times a week. When you first go you will find out that you are not as fit as you think. The key is to start slow and build up. It will hurt for some time but hang in there.
Start looking for a new job. If you are not enjoying the job you are in look for a change in work. Find a job that will fulfill you. There are jobs out there you just have to look. I have changed my job in the last 3 weeks and it looks like I am on the right track.
I started all these changes at the beginning of this year and I am still going and it is the best that I have been in years but I have still got a lot to do. I have to lose more weight. But by getting fit and changing my job my work life and my home life is changing and I will be living much longer and happier.
Work Life Balance Foundation: Well we wish you a long and happy life and congratulate on the positive steps that you have taken. Hopefully your actions will give people some hope and some practical advice that can make a difference in their lives. Thanks again, Steve.
I spend a lot of my week researching ways for the Work Life Balance Foundation to help improve health, energy and stress relief in the workplace and to get a healthier work life balance. When researching I place a lot more credence on actual real-life experience rather than relying on a lot of academic and bureaucratic advice that rarely seems to relate to our everyday lives. This is why when I met Steve Symonds and heard his incredible story of how he is successfully turning his health, work and work life balance around I said to him, "People have to got hear about this."
So what is so special about Steve´s story?
It represents a common predicament that many middle-aged workers find themselves in after years of slaving away in jobs we don´t necessarily like and not looking after ourselves the way we ought to. More importantly Steve shares in the interview with the Work Life Balance Foundation how he is successfully making the transition to creating a healthier, happier and more balanced working individual. And to me Steve is your real-life work life balance expert…
Work Life Balance Foundation: So Steve, what does having an ideal work life balance mean to you?
Steve: Ideal work life is being happy in what you are doing and that you are working in a stress fee environment. Your life is much happier and your family is happier. You tend to live longer and can cope with life better.
Work Life Balance Foundation: Why don´t we have the kind of work life balance that we really want?
Steve: We as adults tend to work in any job that comes along and we stay in that job even if we don´t like it. We as parents have to work to support our family so and with the economy that we live in.
Work Life Balance Foundation: Why do you think it´s important for people in to have a good work life balance?
Steve: Our bodies and our minds can cope with the day-to-day stresses and still have enough in the tank for when you get home after work, which makes for a happy family life.
Work Life Balance Foundation: What´s the one thing that you do that helps give you a good work life balance?
Steve: Keeping fit and active, going to the doctor and have regular check ups. Keeping your body in good shape. Learning new things each day.
Work Life Balance Foundation: If you were to give one piece of advice on improving someone´s work life balance, what would it be?
Steve: Start going to the gym and keep your body in good shape and find the right job.
Work Life Balance Foundation: What do you wish you had learned earlier about improving your work life balance?
Steve: Finding the right job that I would enjoy and to make a difference to somebody else.
Work Life Balance Foundation: Is there any other things that you have learnt from your own experience that you think people should know?
Steve: With my life this year I had to make some big decisions. I had the choice of staying sick and have no motivation to enjoy life or I had the choice to move on and get well.
When I made the decision to get well I made sure that I kept the decision that in front of me at all times.
Work Life Balance Foundation: What do you mean by "keeping the decision in front of you"?
Steve: I´m a fairly self-motivated person so it meant that I stopped focusing on the past and the problems I had and I started focusing on getting well and looked forward to the future?
Work Life Balance Foundation: What motivated you to make the decision to get well?
Steve: Two things. I did look a bit back to the past. I remembered that my Dad died at the age of 65. And secondly I have a young family and I´m looking forward to being a Dad and to becoming a grandfather one day.
Work Life Balance Foundation: To get motivated we often talk about asking ourselves two questions:
"What pain will I or others experience if I keep doing what I´m doing?"
And you saw your Dad dying young and focused on the pain of your children growing up without their father.
And secondly: "What important and fulfilling thing will result if I take the action that I need?" And there you focused on your future on the joys of being a father and a grandfather.
So what other things has your experience taught you?
Steve: How important it is to get my body in good shape. This is by going to the doctor first and getting checked out. Then listen to what the doctor is saying and follow his instructions.
I have found a good gym; I have a personal trainer to motivate me. I have a trainer once a week and I go to gym at lest 3 times a week. When you first go you will find out that you are not as fit as you think. The key is to start slow and build up. It will hurt for some time but hang in there.
Start looking for a new job. If you are not enjoying the job you are in look for a change in work. Find a job that will fulfill you. There are jobs out there you just have to look. I have changed my job in the last 3 weeks and it looks like I am on the right track.
I started all these changes at the beginning of this year and I am still going and it is the best that I have been in years but I have still got a lot to do. I have to lose more weight. But by getting fit and changing my job my work life and my home life is changing and I will be living much longer and happier.
Work Life Balance Foundation: Well we wish you a long and happy life and congratulate on the positive steps that you have taken. Hopefully your actions will give people some hope and some practical advice that can make a difference in their lives. Thanks again, Steve.
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