Caring For Kinds With Diabetes
Subodh Jain
October 27, 2008
Diabetes affects the entire family beyond the lifestyle adjustments a family is faced with, there is fear, guilt, jealousy, anger, and other emotions to come to terms with. Both the parent/child and the sibling relationship can face difficult challenges that require empathy, discipline, and flexibility to work through and beyond. Whether a parent or child has diabetes, the whole family can benefit from diabetes education classes. Even small children can learn more about the disease through age-appropriate books. It's easy to feel isolated when you have diabetes, and involvement of the family goes a long way toward creating a caring and supportive environment that makes control easier.
To Love And Not Overprotect
When your child has diabetes, he or she has more boundaries than others, and it can be easy to fall into the trap of making them tighter than necessary. Letting your fears overtake your child's normal social development is not healthy for either of you. Kids need to be kids to participate in sports, to go to birthday parties, to spend the day at the beach with friends, and to go to school dances and football games. Follow the "first do no harm" motto of the medical profession and take the least-invasive route when making decisions on what your child can and cannot do, based on your child's age, responsibility; and level of competence with her or his own diabetes care. And if you must say no, let your child know the reasoning behind the decision. "Because I said so" is not a good explanation, and will not help to make boundaries clearer to your son or daughter. As your child grows and takes a greater deal of control over her own care, you may find yourself feeling strangely unneeded. Remember that your adolescent is forming her own identity and needs the autonomy to make some of her own treatment decisions and take over more of her day to day management. You do need to remain a partner in her care, however. Asking if she's changed her infusion set or helping her check her glucose if she doesn't look well is still your responsibility as parent and care partner.
Sibling Issues
One child has diabetes and the other doesn't. How do you balance one child's restrictions with the other's relative lack of them? And how do you balance out all the necessary time and attention given to caring for your child with diabetes in the eyes of your child who doesn't require constant oversight? Parenting can be even more of a challenge when you're caring for a child with diabetes and a child without it. You feel as if you're constantly saying "no" to both of them. Try to make life as normal as possible for both of them. Healthy eating habits and activity should be a family goal. The sibling without diabetes should be educated about the other's special needs, something that will probably come naturally in the course of everyday home life. However, you need to make it clear that only parents or another responsible adult are to treat the disease, as some children may try to "help" with a younger sibling and unknowingly place them in danger. Your child with diabetes needs to feel safe about his care, and also guilt free about having special requirements associated with the disease. At the same time, don't let your child get manipulative with his disease. Using it as an excuse to get out of chores or tasks, or playing the "poor me" card to get you to agree to special privileges should not be allowed, particularly when it's at the expense of your other child. Being a parent of a dual-diagnosis Cone with, one without) household can be a challenge, but you're up to the task.
To Love And Not Overprotect
When your child has diabetes, he or she has more boundaries than others, and it can be easy to fall into the trap of making them tighter than necessary. Letting your fears overtake your child's normal social development is not healthy for either of you. Kids need to be kids to participate in sports, to go to birthday parties, to spend the day at the beach with friends, and to go to school dances and football games. Follow the "first do no harm" motto of the medical profession and take the least-invasive route when making decisions on what your child can and cannot do, based on your child's age, responsibility; and level of competence with her or his own diabetes care. And if you must say no, let your child know the reasoning behind the decision. "Because I said so" is not a good explanation, and will not help to make boundaries clearer to your son or daughter. As your child grows and takes a greater deal of control over her own care, you may find yourself feeling strangely unneeded. Remember that your adolescent is forming her own identity and needs the autonomy to make some of her own treatment decisions and take over more of her day to day management. You do need to remain a partner in her care, however. Asking if she's changed her infusion set or helping her check her glucose if she doesn't look well is still your responsibility as parent and care partner.
Sibling Issues
One child has diabetes and the other doesn't. How do you balance one child's restrictions with the other's relative lack of them? And how do you balance out all the necessary time and attention given to caring for your child with diabetes in the eyes of your child who doesn't require constant oversight? Parenting can be even more of a challenge when you're caring for a child with diabetes and a child without it. You feel as if you're constantly saying "no" to both of them. Try to make life as normal as possible for both of them. Healthy eating habits and activity should be a family goal. The sibling without diabetes should be educated about the other's special needs, something that will probably come naturally in the course of everyday home life. However, you need to make it clear that only parents or another responsible adult are to treat the disease, as some children may try to "help" with a younger sibling and unknowingly place them in danger. Your child with diabetes needs to feel safe about his care, and also guilt free about having special requirements associated with the disease. At the same time, don't let your child get manipulative with his disease. Using it as an excuse to get out of chores or tasks, or playing the "poor me" card to get you to agree to special privileges should not be allowed, particularly when it's at the expense of your other child. Being a parent of a dual-diagnosis Cone with, one without) household can be a challenge, but you're up to the task.
For more inforamtion on Diabetes Care Specialist and Diabetes Care.
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