Why Peter Cook Wants to Blame Christie Brinkley for His Affair, Which Led to Their Divorce
Ruth Houston
October 08, 2008
In an interview scheduled to air on Friday on ABC's "20/20," Peter Cook claims he cheated on Christie because as he says, "I was seeking a connection I could not find in my own marriage."
As an infidelity expert who is frequently called on by the media to comment on celebrity infidelity and other infidelity issues in the news, I feel compelled to speak out on this lame, but newly popular excuse that Peter Cook is using to justify the marital misbehavior that led to his divorce.
It doesn´t surprise me that Peter Cook is trying to blame his ex-wife, Christie Brinkley for the extramarital affair that led to their divorce. He´s latched onto the latest excuse that cheating husbands are using to blame their wives for their marital misbehavior.
Cook has taken his cue from the highly controversial new infidelity book The Truth About Cheating – Why Men Stray and What You Can Do About It. He´s parroting the view espoused by author Gary Neuman, that emotional dissatisfaction is the primary reason men cheat.
Neuman´s theory ( based on interviews with 100 cheating husbands) is that men cheat because they feel unappreciated – because they don´t get enough praise, attention or ego stroking from their wives.
You can see how this excuse would appeal to a narcissist like Peter Cook.
By latching onto this newly introduced, widely publicized -- and highly erroneous -- reason for why men cheat, Cook, a confirmed narcissist, (the opinion of the court appointed psychiatrist in his divorce trial) undoubtedly saw this as yet another way to thrust himself into the spotlight which he so dearly loves.
Peter Cook´s Search for an Emotional Connection
In his interview with Barbara Walters, Cook says he was seeking a connection he could not find in his marriage because the emotional aspect of their lives had changed. .Are we to believe he found this emotional connection with a teenager less than half his age? Or that he found it by spending $3600 a month on internet porn, or by broadcasting photos of himself masturbating all across the web?
When asked what he wanted, Cook replied that he wanted "a little acknowledgement, a little attention, a little thank you every now and then for my efforts, for the amount of time I took to care for her and my family, for the wealth I was building."
I followed the Brinkley-Cook trial very closely and was interviewed several times about it. Let me remind you that this statement comes from a man who owned a successful architectural firm in the Hamptons, yet never paid for anything during the 10 years he was married to Christie Brinkley ( her words, not mine) – a man who even charged the Mother´s Day flowers he bought her to his wife´s account.
Yet he could afford to give his teenage mistress $15,000 for a down payment on a new car, and pay her another $300,000 in hush money to keep quiet after their affair was discovered, not to mention the hundreds of dollars he hid beneath rocks and behind picture frames for his young lover to find. Whose wealth was he trying to build? His mistress´s?
The "Blame Your Wife" Bandwagon
Cook is not the only cheating husband to jump on the " Blame Your Wife" bandwagon. Since the publication of the The Truth about Cheating and the author´s two highly publicized interviews with Oprah, countless numbers of cheating men have latched on to this flimsy excuse of "emotional dissatisfaction" as justification for their affairs.
I can´t even begin to tell you how many women have called or e-mailed me since The Truth about Cheating came out, wanting to know if they´re to blame because their husbands had an affair. Of course the answer resounding "NO." But the inquiries finally reached the point where I had to address the questions asked by these concerned, distraught, and sometimes angry women in a post on my blog entitled Are Wives to Blame When Their Husbands Cheat? You can read it at
http://infidelitynewsandviews.blogspot.com/2008/09/are-wives-to-blame-when-their-husbands.html
Although Neuman´s book, The Truth about Cheating, contains some valid suggestions on how women can strengthen and improve the quality of their marriages, the book seems to have created more problems than it has solved.
Besides giving cheating husbands a new excuse – emotional dissatisfaction - to explain away their infidelity, Neuman lays the blame for their affairs squarely at their wives´ feet. How so? Neuman promotes the idea that if a wife keeps her husband happy by constantly stroking his ego, giving him all the sex he wants, and catering to his every whim, he´s guaranteed not to cheat.
There are two problems with that:
"1. While there are many things a wife can do to improve the quality of her marriage, there is absolutely nothing she can do that is guaranteed 100% to prevent her husband from having an affair.
To say that certain actions or behavior on the part of a wife will keep her husband from having an affair, is to imply that it´s her fault if her husband cheats."
"2. Keeping your husband happy is not the answer because happy husbands cheat too. Just this year there have been three studies published in medical journals which prove that happily married husbands still cheat on their wives, and that even good marriages are susceptible to infidelity. : There is an article on my website, www.InfidelityAdvice.com entitled Happy Husbands Cheat, Too, which goes into more detail about this topic and cites four infidelity studies that prove this point."
Although Neuman says his book is about empowering women rather than blaming them, I disagree. You don´t empower a woman by making her feel that her husband´s affair was her fault. Nor do you empower women by providing men like Peter Cook with yet another excuse to justify why they cheated on their wives.
Some men are more likely to cheat than others. To find out if your husband is one of these potential cheaters, send for a free copy of the 7-question Potential Cheater´s Quiz by e-mailing InfidelityInfo@gmail.com with Potential Cheater´s Quiz - ac in the subject line.
For more information about infidelity, cheating husbands and extramarital affairs, visit www.InfidelityAdvice.com or Ruth Houston´s infidelity blog at http://infidelitynewsandviews.blogspot.com
About the Author:
Infidelity expert Ruth Houston is the founder of www.InfidelityAdvice.com and the author of "Is He Cheating on You? - 829 Telltale Signs, "which lists practically every known sign of infidelity, including the subtle signs people usually overlook.
Frequently called on by the media to comment on infidelity issues in the news, Ruth has been quoted in "USA Today, the New York Times, the Wall Street Journal, the Los Angeles Times, New York Daily News, Cosmopolitan, the New York Post, the Chicago Tribune, the Houston Chronicle, the Toronto Sun, Maclean's, MSN Lifestyle, FoxNews.com, ABCNews.com, msnbc.com, Divorce360.com, iVillage, Reuters, AP, UPI and numerous other print and online media.
Ruth has been a guest on "The Today Show, Good Morning America, CNN, Fox & Friends, The Morning Show with Mike and Juliet, NBC News, BBC, CBC, WCBS, ABC News, Fox News " and over 440 other radio and TV talk shows in the United States, Canada, Europe, South America, Australia, New Zealand, Africa and the Caribbean.
To interview infidelity expert Ruth Houston, call 718 592-6039 or e-mail InfidelityExpert@gmail.com
As an infidelity expert who is frequently called on by the media to comment on celebrity infidelity and other infidelity issues in the news, I feel compelled to speak out on this lame, but newly popular excuse that Peter Cook is using to justify the marital misbehavior that led to his divorce.
It doesn´t surprise me that Peter Cook is trying to blame his ex-wife, Christie Brinkley for the extramarital affair that led to their divorce. He´s latched onto the latest excuse that cheating husbands are using to blame their wives for their marital misbehavior.
Cook has taken his cue from the highly controversial new infidelity book The Truth About Cheating – Why Men Stray and What You Can Do About It. He´s parroting the view espoused by author Gary Neuman, that emotional dissatisfaction is the primary reason men cheat.
Neuman´s theory ( based on interviews with 100 cheating husbands) is that men cheat because they feel unappreciated – because they don´t get enough praise, attention or ego stroking from their wives.
You can see how this excuse would appeal to a narcissist like Peter Cook.
By latching onto this newly introduced, widely publicized -- and highly erroneous -- reason for why men cheat, Cook, a confirmed narcissist, (the opinion of the court appointed psychiatrist in his divorce trial) undoubtedly saw this as yet another way to thrust himself into the spotlight which he so dearly loves.
Peter Cook´s Search for an Emotional Connection
In his interview with Barbara Walters, Cook says he was seeking a connection he could not find in his marriage because the emotional aspect of their lives had changed. .Are we to believe he found this emotional connection with a teenager less than half his age? Or that he found it by spending $3600 a month on internet porn, or by broadcasting photos of himself masturbating all across the web?
When asked what he wanted, Cook replied that he wanted "a little acknowledgement, a little attention, a little thank you every now and then for my efforts, for the amount of time I took to care for her and my family, for the wealth I was building."
I followed the Brinkley-Cook trial very closely and was interviewed several times about it. Let me remind you that this statement comes from a man who owned a successful architectural firm in the Hamptons, yet never paid for anything during the 10 years he was married to Christie Brinkley ( her words, not mine) – a man who even charged the Mother´s Day flowers he bought her to his wife´s account.
Yet he could afford to give his teenage mistress $15,000 for a down payment on a new car, and pay her another $300,000 in hush money to keep quiet after their affair was discovered, not to mention the hundreds of dollars he hid beneath rocks and behind picture frames for his young lover to find. Whose wealth was he trying to build? His mistress´s?
The "Blame Your Wife" Bandwagon
Cook is not the only cheating husband to jump on the " Blame Your Wife" bandwagon. Since the publication of the The Truth about Cheating and the author´s two highly publicized interviews with Oprah, countless numbers of cheating men have latched on to this flimsy excuse of "emotional dissatisfaction" as justification for their affairs.
I can´t even begin to tell you how many women have called or e-mailed me since The Truth about Cheating came out, wanting to know if they´re to blame because their husbands had an affair. Of course the answer resounding "NO." But the inquiries finally reached the point where I had to address the questions asked by these concerned, distraught, and sometimes angry women in a post on my blog entitled Are Wives to Blame When Their Husbands Cheat? You can read it at
http://infidelitynewsandviews.blogspot.com/2008/09/are-wives-to-blame-when-their-husbands.html
Although Neuman´s book, The Truth about Cheating, contains some valid suggestions on how women can strengthen and improve the quality of their marriages, the book seems to have created more problems than it has solved.
Besides giving cheating husbands a new excuse – emotional dissatisfaction - to explain away their infidelity, Neuman lays the blame for their affairs squarely at their wives´ feet. How so? Neuman promotes the idea that if a wife keeps her husband happy by constantly stroking his ego, giving him all the sex he wants, and catering to his every whim, he´s guaranteed not to cheat.
There are two problems with that:
"1. While there are many things a wife can do to improve the quality of her marriage, there is absolutely nothing she can do that is guaranteed 100% to prevent her husband from having an affair.
To say that certain actions or behavior on the part of a wife will keep her husband from having an affair, is to imply that it´s her fault if her husband cheats."
"2. Keeping your husband happy is not the answer because happy husbands cheat too. Just this year there have been three studies published in medical journals which prove that happily married husbands still cheat on their wives, and that even good marriages are susceptible to infidelity. : There is an article on my website, www.InfidelityAdvice.com entitled Happy Husbands Cheat, Too, which goes into more detail about this topic and cites four infidelity studies that prove this point."
Although Neuman says his book is about empowering women rather than blaming them, I disagree. You don´t empower a woman by making her feel that her husband´s affair was her fault. Nor do you empower women by providing men like Peter Cook with yet another excuse to justify why they cheated on their wives.
Some men are more likely to cheat than others. To find out if your husband is one of these potential cheaters, send for a free copy of the 7-question Potential Cheater´s Quiz by e-mailing InfidelityInfo@gmail.com with Potential Cheater´s Quiz - ac in the subject line.
For more information about infidelity, cheating husbands and extramarital affairs, visit www.InfidelityAdvice.com or Ruth Houston´s infidelity blog at http://infidelitynewsandviews.blogspot.com
About the Author:
Infidelity expert Ruth Houston is the founder of www.InfidelityAdvice.com and the author of "Is He Cheating on You? - 829 Telltale Signs, "which lists practically every known sign of infidelity, including the subtle signs people usually overlook.
Frequently called on by the media to comment on infidelity issues in the news, Ruth has been quoted in "USA Today, the New York Times, the Wall Street Journal, the Los Angeles Times, New York Daily News, Cosmopolitan, the New York Post, the Chicago Tribune, the Houston Chronicle, the Toronto Sun, Maclean's, MSN Lifestyle, FoxNews.com, ABCNews.com, msnbc.com, Divorce360.com, iVillage, Reuters, AP, UPI and numerous other print and online media.
Ruth has been a guest on "The Today Show, Good Morning America, CNN, Fox & Friends, The Morning Show with Mike and Juliet, NBC News, BBC, CBC, WCBS, ABC News, Fox News " and over 440 other radio and TV talk shows in the United States, Canada, Europe, South America, Australia, New Zealand, Africa and the Caribbean.
To interview infidelity expert Ruth Houston, call 718 592-6039 or e-mail InfidelityExpert@gmail.com
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