You and The Rest
Amar Bahadur Shrestha
September 18, 2008
Do you know what is meant by the word, "psychopath"? I don't but I do believe that a psychopath is similar to a 'sociopath'. Which means one who has deviated from normally accepted social behavior. Now this is where the confusion arises, what exactly is 'normally accepted behavior'? It's like asking, 'what is your favorite food?' Would you be horrified if somebody, maybe a Korean, said 'dogs'? Or maybe a Chinese, told you, 'snakes'? And if you were Chinese, would you be astounded to know that the Englishman prefers potatoes mashed to the delicacy of monkey's brain?
It's really a huge amalgam of vastly differing societies that inhabit the planet earth. We live within confined bounds of our perceived societies and that is why we have to be more objective. Social expectations are the backbone of social interactions and everybody has a duty to perform towards the fulfilling of expectations of his/her own social group. This makes the task of understanding accepted social behavior more practical. However, is it a practical thing to live upto expectations all the time?
As it is we are heading for increasingly troubled times in terms of coming to grips with the hard truth that increased individualism arising from greater knowledge will not necessarily mean that we will be living freer lives. There will always be society to contend with. And society dictates that we put a hold on our individualism.
We must not be under the impression that decisions affecting our own lives will remain always as our own wise decisions. No way can this be possible if we are to accept that we have to live within the bounds of socially accepted behavior. Every decision we make is due to not only our logical thinking but also due to muddy thoughts of what others will feel and how one's standing in society will be affected.
Does this occur as a subconscious mindset? Of course it is very easy to say yes and sound wise but I must say no, we let society dictate our actions quite consciously. Does this limit our potential? Again it is easy to say yes and sound intelligent but again I will say no, our potentials are not limited but rather kept at bay till such a time as is deemed correct.
We cannot ignore society no matter how individualistic we are, but at the same time we cannot blame our shortcomings on the inhibitions set by social dictums. We are our own masters all right, but we cannot always have things our way. If you have things our own way for at least fifty percent of the time, you should be happy. The other fifty percent you should take pragmatically. By doing so you will have mastered the art of Zen, wouldn't you be proud to know?
Isn't it nice to know that one can achieve so much by just coming to terms with the hard-boiled truth that one has to compromise with society? Not surrender mind you. That would be cowardice leading to loss of self-respect, inner anxieties and futile behavior. Live upto the role you were meant to play in the drama of life, surely you have by now known your strengths and weaknesses but do not forget that there are certain limitations on each one of us. Oh yes so you can paint, but can you be another Picasso? So you can write, but can you become another Tolstoy?
Surely you can climb Everest, but is that what you want to do? Do you need to show society a thing or two? Show them what you are capable of? It´s better to know one's true capabilities and stop at that rather than trying to top the other guy and look better among peers. Try all you want to become a better person but never ever make the mistake of thinking along the vein above. Stop that.
Live your life the way you want to but give some consideration to those around you. Remember always that one man's meat is another's poison, so it's going to take some salting and a little bit of weeding to change the scenario.
It's really a huge amalgam of vastly differing societies that inhabit the planet earth. We live within confined bounds of our perceived societies and that is why we have to be more objective. Social expectations are the backbone of social interactions and everybody has a duty to perform towards the fulfilling of expectations of his/her own social group. This makes the task of understanding accepted social behavior more practical. However, is it a practical thing to live upto expectations all the time?
As it is we are heading for increasingly troubled times in terms of coming to grips with the hard truth that increased individualism arising from greater knowledge will not necessarily mean that we will be living freer lives. There will always be society to contend with. And society dictates that we put a hold on our individualism.
We must not be under the impression that decisions affecting our own lives will remain always as our own wise decisions. No way can this be possible if we are to accept that we have to live within the bounds of socially accepted behavior. Every decision we make is due to not only our logical thinking but also due to muddy thoughts of what others will feel and how one's standing in society will be affected.
Does this occur as a subconscious mindset? Of course it is very easy to say yes and sound wise but I must say no, we let society dictate our actions quite consciously. Does this limit our potential? Again it is easy to say yes and sound intelligent but again I will say no, our potentials are not limited but rather kept at bay till such a time as is deemed correct.
We cannot ignore society no matter how individualistic we are, but at the same time we cannot blame our shortcomings on the inhibitions set by social dictums. We are our own masters all right, but we cannot always have things our way. If you have things our own way for at least fifty percent of the time, you should be happy. The other fifty percent you should take pragmatically. By doing so you will have mastered the art of Zen, wouldn't you be proud to know?
Isn't it nice to know that one can achieve so much by just coming to terms with the hard-boiled truth that one has to compromise with society? Not surrender mind you. That would be cowardice leading to loss of self-respect, inner anxieties and futile behavior. Live upto the role you were meant to play in the drama of life, surely you have by now known your strengths and weaknesses but do not forget that there are certain limitations on each one of us. Oh yes so you can paint, but can you be another Picasso? So you can write, but can you become another Tolstoy?
Surely you can climb Everest, but is that what you want to do? Do you need to show society a thing or two? Show them what you are capable of? It´s better to know one's true capabilities and stop at that rather than trying to top the other guy and look better among peers. Try all you want to become a better person but never ever make the mistake of thinking along the vein above. Stop that.
Live your life the way you want to but give some consideration to those around you. Remember always that one man's meat is another's poison, so it's going to take some salting and a little bit of weeding to change the scenario.
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