Why Guys Text Instead of Call
Elaine Sihera
July 18, 2008
Q. Why does a guy say he will call but only text ? Met this guy and then we try to organise our dates- he often said he would call. Then while I had almost given up- he would send a text to organise things- it always on the day he said he would call. He just send a text very late that day! Am I expecting too much or is something wrong? Sometimes when I called he seemed to be happy... How can I let him know if he says he would call it should mean he will call!
A. There are a number of reasons why he texts you. It could be because:
1. Phoning is more expensive for him than texting. He probably doesn't want to admit this to you.
2. He feels shy to talk to you so he leaves it until the last minute as well so that he can get it over with, especially if you say that he doesn't seem to mind when you call him.
3. He can only call at certain times because he may be in a relationship. That's probably why he leaves it until the last minute as well. He sounds pre-occupied with other things.
4. He probably doesn't realise how much the calls mean to you, especially if he is the casual sort who texts his mates regularly.
5. He is not as interested in you as you hope and so he is deliberately texting you to keep contact to a minimum because he probably lacks the courage to tell you so.Only you know your situation to be able to choose which ones might apply.
It is frustrating when someone promises to do something and doesn't, especially a phone call. But usually when there is hesitation, or unfulfilled promises, it is because the feeling isn't reciprocal or the person is genuinely shy. He's probably not sure of how to deal with the conversation and uses the texts instead to keep the distance between you. As to telling him how that affects you, if you are open with your feelings, gently but firmly letting him know that he shouldn't promise to call without doing it might help the situation. If he really doesn't like you as much as you like him, it won't make any difference.
A. There are a number of reasons why he texts you. It could be because:
1. Phoning is more expensive for him than texting. He probably doesn't want to admit this to you.
2. He feels shy to talk to you so he leaves it until the last minute as well so that he can get it over with, especially if you say that he doesn't seem to mind when you call him.
3. He can only call at certain times because he may be in a relationship. That's probably why he leaves it until the last minute as well. He sounds pre-occupied with other things.
4. He probably doesn't realise how much the calls mean to you, especially if he is the casual sort who texts his mates regularly.
5. He is not as interested in you as you hope and so he is deliberately texting you to keep contact to a minimum because he probably lacks the courage to tell you so.Only you know your situation to be able to choose which ones might apply.
It is frustrating when someone promises to do something and doesn't, especially a phone call. But usually when there is hesitation, or unfulfilled promises, it is because the feeling isn't reciprocal or the person is genuinely shy. He's probably not sure of how to deal with the conversation and uses the texts instead to keep the distance between you. As to telling him how that affects you, if you are open with your feelings, gently but firmly letting him know that he shouldn't promise to call without doing it might help the situation. If he really doesn't like you as much as you like him, it won't make any difference.
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