Equal Rights: Men and Women and Reality! (Here we go!)
Michael C. Morris
January 18, 2008
When you venture to write an article like this you know up front that you will open the Pandora´s Box of the evils between men and women. But the truth is that until men and women have an open and honest conversation about the issues brought up in the article I wrote "The Ten Commandments: An Honest Look", the battle will rage on with no end in sight as it does in Iraq.
What started the conversation was a comment about the Femi Nazi´s that has given the green light to women to do what they want and cry wolf. While my view point of this is not as extreme I do agree with the premise. And here is why:
When the feminist movement began, like all unions, it was based on the reality that women were not being treated the same as the men in the work place. This was true for that day and age, 1960´s. Women that were abused (truly abuse as in beat, raped, etc.) had no place to seek shelter and the court systems turned a deaf ear to the screams for help. From this viewpoint, the feminist movement was needed and accomplished most of what they originally desired. This is where things started to go horribly wrong.
As more and more "angry" women embedded themselves in "the system" through the equal rights of education, equal opportunity and so on, they carried that anger with them and over the years have written laws and convinced the public that ANYTIME a woman cries abuse, we MUST crucify the man who did it regardless of the truth. This injustice, now reversed and placed upon men has caused domestic violence to skyrocket, why?
Let´s break this down into its individual parts.
First men and woman ARE different, not just biologically, but how we are wired. This was intentional by Mother Nature, God or who ever you might attribute creation to. Male and females were put on this earth, in every form, to compliment each other, to work together for survival, and to propagate. Anything that goes in opposition to that "hard wiring" creates conflict and therefore generates fear/fight in men and protection of the young in women.
Second part, equality does not breed violence. When people are treated as equals, conflict is avoided. Equality should be the standard used in most cases except when there is a clear reason that one should benefit. Example: A cheating spouse. If you cheat you made you decision and the consequences for that action should come full force down around your neck.
Third part is fair and equal treatment. This was covered above, but the laws of the land must also reflect this idea. So let look at the reality.
NOTHING I said above is being used by our society, as a matter of fact, everything is intentionally, let me repeat that, intentionally set up in opposition of the way things should be. Want proof?
There is a real case right now where a man is being ordered to pay his ex-wife $4000.00 per month in alimony. This is not unusual except that they are getting divorced because his ex-wife murdered there son and is in jail for it.
This case is a perfect example of how the system has become in opposition of everything right and wrong and will only serve to get someone killed.
First and foremost I think I can speak for every woman in the world when I say that it would be a cold day in hell before he would get paid a penny after he murdered my son if the situation was reversed. YET, some out there will see no problem with the man being ordered to have to do this, even though no woman would ever agree to this court order.
Next, if it was me in this circumstance, and some wacko judge ordered me to do something like this (which by the way HAS happened) I would tell him to pound sand and you can bet your bottom dollar I would be fighting mad. Next, because I will not obey his wacko order I would be arrested only serving to escalate the anger to the point of rage. Being that my ex-wife had to have the nerve to REQUEST alimony after she murdered my son, what do you think is the next action that will happen. This is how the courts are directly responsible for 70% of the domestic violence in this country. And I know you are thinking this is an isolated incident. You are WRONG! Decisions like this happen every minute of every day in these courts.
Domestic violence is a big problem is this country (and yes I know that there are real cases of crazy men AND crazy women) but the above example I hope shows how injustice can create domestic violence. (And for all the Femi Nazi´s out there that will read this, you would better spend your time making sure equal justice is enforced as opposed to compliance through torture and abuse and you could stop 70% of the domestic violence that happens in this country, but then again that would not give you something to rant and rave about.)
Equality is a joke in the courts today between men and women as if you are a woman you do not have to have a reason that you want a divorce, you can just wake up one day and say, don´t want to be here and you already know that in general you will walk away with 60 to 70% of the assets, 95% chance of walking away with the kids, and support in the form of up to 54% of his gross paycheck. No down side even if you cheat, give birth to someone else´s children during you marriage and so on.
Another example of inequality even though the Constitution guarantees it.
Domestic violence is wrong period, but while almost all the cases are men against women, there are a lot of reverse case of women against men. The reason the numbers are not higher is because men are too ashamed to report it. But here is the rub. As far as I know there is not one shelter in the United States that accepts men and their children even though federal tax dollars (in the billions) pay for it. Public defenders will not defend men in an abuse case as they are ALWAYS the abuser. And here is the best part; the definition of abuse is now lowered to derogatory remarks or putdowns.
In one of the comments, the person stated that his niece in law sat at the Thanksgiving dinner table and berated her "asshole husband" using those exact words in front of not only her husband but the entire family. While that would constitute abuse if a man had said it, no court in the world would take a man seriously if he reported it. Equality between men and women in the courts is a joke.
What has all this nonsense brought us too?
Speaking as a male, who has talked with other males all across this country, the base feeling is that women, being led by outside forces and enforced by a corrupted court system, are un-trustworthy. In the balance of pro´s and con´s, (and yes I know there are horror stories on both sides, but I am only speaking from the male point because it is the only point I have the right to speak for) most of the men that women would find "prime" from ages in the early 20´s to the late 60´s who are on track for great careers or have had great careers, want nothing to do with women, marriage and children. While the younger ones say they date, it is only short term, for sex and they protect themselves.
A recent study in Australia women 25 years old and under were surveyed if they were married and had children. Only 12% of the women, down from 33% in the 1990´s, were married and had children. When asked why, the answer was that while they wanted to be married and have children, they could not find any men willing to make the commitment. When the men were surveyed, their answer was that they had seen the destruction that had been done to their parents by marriage and divorce and they wanted no part of it.
What is the truth of the reality?
The most precious thing that we get to experience on this earth is Love, true love. The love of your children, the love of you spouse and the love of your family and friends. Is there anything as great as waking up every morning proud to be with the person next to you, her/his smile, and her/his eyes. Yet everyday we find more ways to separate ourselves from one another without as much as a thought of the consequences of our actions.
Being that the ratio of men to women started at 2 to 1 and has been expanding, throw in the subject matter above, add in men who are gay, and women are down to about a 9% chance they will get married for life and have children, and that will get lower with time.
The system will not change until women change it. Men can not change the system as it only perceived as men being cry babies at how they are treated. So men will do what men always do, the will avoid the situation all together, and in truth, that would be my advice until the system changes
Please keep your comments civil and constructive.
What started the conversation was a comment about the Femi Nazi´s that has given the green light to women to do what they want and cry wolf. While my view point of this is not as extreme I do agree with the premise. And here is why:
When the feminist movement began, like all unions, it was based on the reality that women were not being treated the same as the men in the work place. This was true for that day and age, 1960´s. Women that were abused (truly abuse as in beat, raped, etc.) had no place to seek shelter and the court systems turned a deaf ear to the screams for help. From this viewpoint, the feminist movement was needed and accomplished most of what they originally desired. This is where things started to go horribly wrong.
As more and more "angry" women embedded themselves in "the system" through the equal rights of education, equal opportunity and so on, they carried that anger with them and over the years have written laws and convinced the public that ANYTIME a woman cries abuse, we MUST crucify the man who did it regardless of the truth. This injustice, now reversed and placed upon men has caused domestic violence to skyrocket, why?
Let´s break this down into its individual parts.
First men and woman ARE different, not just biologically, but how we are wired. This was intentional by Mother Nature, God or who ever you might attribute creation to. Male and females were put on this earth, in every form, to compliment each other, to work together for survival, and to propagate. Anything that goes in opposition to that "hard wiring" creates conflict and therefore generates fear/fight in men and protection of the young in women.
Second part, equality does not breed violence. When people are treated as equals, conflict is avoided. Equality should be the standard used in most cases except when there is a clear reason that one should benefit. Example: A cheating spouse. If you cheat you made you decision and the consequences for that action should come full force down around your neck.
Third part is fair and equal treatment. This was covered above, but the laws of the land must also reflect this idea. So let look at the reality.
NOTHING I said above is being used by our society, as a matter of fact, everything is intentionally, let me repeat that, intentionally set up in opposition of the way things should be. Want proof?
There is a real case right now where a man is being ordered to pay his ex-wife $4000.00 per month in alimony. This is not unusual except that they are getting divorced because his ex-wife murdered there son and is in jail for it.
This case is a perfect example of how the system has become in opposition of everything right and wrong and will only serve to get someone killed.
First and foremost I think I can speak for every woman in the world when I say that it would be a cold day in hell before he would get paid a penny after he murdered my son if the situation was reversed. YET, some out there will see no problem with the man being ordered to have to do this, even though no woman would ever agree to this court order.
Next, if it was me in this circumstance, and some wacko judge ordered me to do something like this (which by the way HAS happened) I would tell him to pound sand and you can bet your bottom dollar I would be fighting mad. Next, because I will not obey his wacko order I would be arrested only serving to escalate the anger to the point of rage. Being that my ex-wife had to have the nerve to REQUEST alimony after she murdered my son, what do you think is the next action that will happen. This is how the courts are directly responsible for 70% of the domestic violence in this country. And I know you are thinking this is an isolated incident. You are WRONG! Decisions like this happen every minute of every day in these courts.
Domestic violence is a big problem is this country (and yes I know that there are real cases of crazy men AND crazy women) but the above example I hope shows how injustice can create domestic violence. (And for all the Femi Nazi´s out there that will read this, you would better spend your time making sure equal justice is enforced as opposed to compliance through torture and abuse and you could stop 70% of the domestic violence that happens in this country, but then again that would not give you something to rant and rave about.)
Equality is a joke in the courts today between men and women as if you are a woman you do not have to have a reason that you want a divorce, you can just wake up one day and say, don´t want to be here and you already know that in general you will walk away with 60 to 70% of the assets, 95% chance of walking away with the kids, and support in the form of up to 54% of his gross paycheck. No down side even if you cheat, give birth to someone else´s children during you marriage and so on.
Another example of inequality even though the Constitution guarantees it.
Domestic violence is wrong period, but while almost all the cases are men against women, there are a lot of reverse case of women against men. The reason the numbers are not higher is because men are too ashamed to report it. But here is the rub. As far as I know there is not one shelter in the United States that accepts men and their children even though federal tax dollars (in the billions) pay for it. Public defenders will not defend men in an abuse case as they are ALWAYS the abuser. And here is the best part; the definition of abuse is now lowered to derogatory remarks or putdowns.
In one of the comments, the person stated that his niece in law sat at the Thanksgiving dinner table and berated her "asshole husband" using those exact words in front of not only her husband but the entire family. While that would constitute abuse if a man had said it, no court in the world would take a man seriously if he reported it. Equality between men and women in the courts is a joke.
What has all this nonsense brought us too?
Speaking as a male, who has talked with other males all across this country, the base feeling is that women, being led by outside forces and enforced by a corrupted court system, are un-trustworthy. In the balance of pro´s and con´s, (and yes I know there are horror stories on both sides, but I am only speaking from the male point because it is the only point I have the right to speak for) most of the men that women would find "prime" from ages in the early 20´s to the late 60´s who are on track for great careers or have had great careers, want nothing to do with women, marriage and children. While the younger ones say they date, it is only short term, for sex and they protect themselves.
A recent study in Australia women 25 years old and under were surveyed if they were married and had children. Only 12% of the women, down from 33% in the 1990´s, were married and had children. When asked why, the answer was that while they wanted to be married and have children, they could not find any men willing to make the commitment. When the men were surveyed, their answer was that they had seen the destruction that had been done to their parents by marriage and divorce and they wanted no part of it.
What is the truth of the reality?
The most precious thing that we get to experience on this earth is Love, true love. The love of your children, the love of you spouse and the love of your family and friends. Is there anything as great as waking up every morning proud to be with the person next to you, her/his smile, and her/his eyes. Yet everyday we find more ways to separate ourselves from one another without as much as a thought of the consequences of our actions.
Being that the ratio of men to women started at 2 to 1 and has been expanding, throw in the subject matter above, add in men who are gay, and women are down to about a 9% chance they will get married for life and have children, and that will get lower with time.
The system will not change until women change it. Men can not change the system as it only perceived as men being cry babies at how they are treated. So men will do what men always do, the will avoid the situation all together, and in truth, that would be my advice until the system changes
Please keep your comments civil and constructive.
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