What's Your Power?
Darren Stansbury
January 10, 2006
A question often asked to pick someone's brain is If You Could Have Any Power In The World What Would It Be? The answer to that question has varied over the years. I've listed the choices with their pros and cons below.
PERFORMING MITOSIS LIKE A GERM. Pros: Your copies could help you with chores and errands. They could go to work for you while you relax at home, and then bring you the money. They could help with expenses and moving, and back you up if you're threatened by a group of thugs. Cons: You and your copies would probably fight over car keys, bathroom time, store items, romantic partners and everything else imaginable. Mitosis also might be just a tad excruciating. Also, would your copies be autonomous or would they be mindless robots on standby while awaiting your commands? The latter would mean your being responsible for each copy's every word and deed. The former could mean your copies trying to control or eliminate you--and each copy would match you in strength, mental sharpness and fighting ability, and know your weaknesses. Maybe you can kick so-and-so's butt, but can you kick your own?
X-RAY VISION. Pros: I guess every guy has fantasized about this at one time or another. Being able to see through walls, doors and clothes could definitely provide some salacious pleasure. You could also make a fortune as a spy, police informant or detective. Con: You'll see a lot--whether you want to or not. Much of what you see beyond walls and doors and beneath worn clothes may not be for the squeamish. You may also be in a dilemma if you witness a crime or other indiscretion.
FLYING LIKE A BIRD. Pros: You save on fuel, auto repairs and auto insurance. You have endless routes to every destination. Cons: It's not for those afraid of heights. Without a bird's instincts you may fly into a thunderstorm. You may also collide with airplanes and bullets. Flying like a bird may require energy you won't have on some days. Some days you just may not be up to flying. (Pardon the pun.) Also, the air is thin and frigid at high altitudes. You may suffer nosebleeds, dyspnea and hypothermia all at once and black out and fall from the sky. Flying like a bird is, well, for the birds.
ESP: PSYCHOKINESIS, MENTAL TELEPATHY, PRECOGNITION. Psychokinesis Pro: From what I've seen on TV I know that those with psychokinesis can bend and move utensils. This might be cool to do at parties as long as you remember to unbend them. Psychokinesis Con: Unless you can use the power for multi-tasking or moving heavy objects it's not too practical. Does the world need more bent utensils? Mental Telepathy Pro: The message sender and receiver can share whatever's on each other's mind around others without fear of being overheard. Mental Telepathy Con: Some thoughts are best not shared. Do you care to know of the bodily function the other person performed earlier in the day? Precognition Pro: You'll be a monster planner. Others will praise you for your vision. (Again, pardon the pun.) Precognition Con: How can you function today knowing you'll be squashed like a bug by a semi tomorrow?
BECOMING INVISIBLE. Pro: It would provide the voyeur the salacious thrills and career options of X-ray vision without the X-ray vision and with better concealment. Perhaps you'll also be undetected by biting, stinging or ferocious creatures. Cons: Wear ample protective gear and buy adequate health and life insurance. In addition to the downsides of having X-ray vision you're in constant risk of being accidentally hit by something while invisible. What happens when you need urgent medical attention?
So, weighing all the options and possibilities, I have to say my power of choice is not on the above list. It's INFINITE WISDOM. With this power I would always do what's right. I'd be a pain to argue with because I'd always be right. The next best power to infinite wisdom would be UNLIMITED MEMORY but that amazing recall is useless without wisdom. Remember this: Remembering is not the same as learning and applying what you've learned.
PERFORMING MITOSIS LIKE A GERM. Pros: Your copies could help you with chores and errands. They could go to work for you while you relax at home, and then bring you the money. They could help with expenses and moving, and back you up if you're threatened by a group of thugs. Cons: You and your copies would probably fight over car keys, bathroom time, store items, romantic partners and everything else imaginable. Mitosis also might be just a tad excruciating. Also, would your copies be autonomous or would they be mindless robots on standby while awaiting your commands? The latter would mean your being responsible for each copy's every word and deed. The former could mean your copies trying to control or eliminate you--and each copy would match you in strength, mental sharpness and fighting ability, and know your weaknesses. Maybe you can kick so-and-so's butt, but can you kick your own?
X-RAY VISION. Pros: I guess every guy has fantasized about this at one time or another. Being able to see through walls, doors and clothes could definitely provide some salacious pleasure. You could also make a fortune as a spy, police informant or detective. Con: You'll see a lot--whether you want to or not. Much of what you see beyond walls and doors and beneath worn clothes may not be for the squeamish. You may also be in a dilemma if you witness a crime or other indiscretion.
FLYING LIKE A BIRD. Pros: You save on fuel, auto repairs and auto insurance. You have endless routes to every destination. Cons: It's not for those afraid of heights. Without a bird's instincts you may fly into a thunderstorm. You may also collide with airplanes and bullets. Flying like a bird may require energy you won't have on some days. Some days you just may not be up to flying. (Pardon the pun.) Also, the air is thin and frigid at high altitudes. You may suffer nosebleeds, dyspnea and hypothermia all at once and black out and fall from the sky. Flying like a bird is, well, for the birds.
ESP: PSYCHOKINESIS, MENTAL TELEPATHY, PRECOGNITION. Psychokinesis Pro: From what I've seen on TV I know that those with psychokinesis can bend and move utensils. This might be cool to do at parties as long as you remember to unbend them. Psychokinesis Con: Unless you can use the power for multi-tasking or moving heavy objects it's not too practical. Does the world need more bent utensils? Mental Telepathy Pro: The message sender and receiver can share whatever's on each other's mind around others without fear of being overheard. Mental Telepathy Con: Some thoughts are best not shared. Do you care to know of the bodily function the other person performed earlier in the day? Precognition Pro: You'll be a monster planner. Others will praise you for your vision. (Again, pardon the pun.) Precognition Con: How can you function today knowing you'll be squashed like a bug by a semi tomorrow?
BECOMING INVISIBLE. Pro: It would provide the voyeur the salacious thrills and career options of X-ray vision without the X-ray vision and with better concealment. Perhaps you'll also be undetected by biting, stinging or ferocious creatures. Cons: Wear ample protective gear and buy adequate health and life insurance. In addition to the downsides of having X-ray vision you're in constant risk of being accidentally hit by something while invisible. What happens when you need urgent medical attention?
So, weighing all the options and possibilities, I have to say my power of choice is not on the above list. It's INFINITE WISDOM. With this power I would always do what's right. I'd be a pain to argue with because I'd always be right. The next best power to infinite wisdom would be UNLIMITED MEMORY but that amazing recall is useless without wisdom. Remember this: Remembering is not the same as learning and applying what you've learned.
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