Age Ban On Rolling Stones Fans Lifted

All the festivities surrounding the Super Bowl are choreographed by the NFL -- this all-powerful entity leaves nothing to chance.

I wouldn't be surprised if NFL meteorologists are hard at work devising a plan to manipulate the weather, insuring that it will always be sunny for Super Bowl Sunday.

The NFL doesn't want any wardrobe malfunctions occurring during its halftime extravaganza.

The NFL is looking for enthusiastic Rolling Stones fans to rush the field during the group's halftime show. The NFL had an original age limit of 45, never mind that the ageless rockers are in their 60's.

The NFL didn't want a bunch of old geezers limping onto the field, that would ruin its image of fun, youth and vitality.

But baby boomers complained and the NFL changed its mind about the age restriction, proving that the squeaky wheel always gets satisfaction.

Now when the Stones perform during the halftime show, you will see young girls in low rider jeans and halter tops as well as middle-aged men in their Dockers rush to the stage in celebration of the geriatric rockers.

Old geezers like me may need a Viagra and Vitamins to "Start Me Up", but we can still grove to the timeless music of the Rolling Stones