Bad morning

I woke up this morning with one of the worst headaches I've had in a very long time. Excruciating pain. It didn't help that I had tossed and turned all night and seemed to awaken every hour on the hour. It was one of those mornings where my wife and I kept hitting the snooze button on the alarm. Then I noticed it was 8:03AM.

CRAP!

Dustin's bus usually arrives at 8:15. With headache in tow, I went to Dustin's room and roused him out of bed to take his morning potty break.

I think it is amazing how Dustin can be wide awake and raring to go by 6:30 or 7:00 on Saturday morning, but during the week, I have to roll him out of bed and coddle him along. After his potty break, I showed him his school uniform, socks, underwear, and shoes and shuffled off for my own morning potty break, then headed back to the bedroom where I could lay down until Dustin was dressed. Unfortunately, when I looked in on Dustin, he was so tired he had put his pants on backwards. Ouch! My headache was growing in size . . . and apparently, from the pressure, my head had to be three times its normal size. I helped Dustin finish dressing, rushed him downstairs, gave him his morning medication and took him to the door to watch for his bus. It was 8:14. I was proud of myself for the swiftness I was able to get him ready. But as I heard the squeak of the bus pulling up, I realized I had forgotten to make Dustin brush his teeth.

You have to understand that because of Dustin's medication, he has breath that would knock a bull moose to the ground in less than three seconds. One of the most powerful forms of halitosis known to man or beast.

I quickly grabbed a tin of Ice Breakers Hot Cinnamon breath mints and popped three of the ultimate tablet version of mouth fresheners into Dustin's mouth and sent him on his merry, albeit wonky, way.

By now, Sheri and the toddlers were heading downstairs. I prepared two juice sippy cups and handed one to McCartney as she bopped into the kitchen. At the age of two, bopping is not that difficult first thing in the morning. There she was stark naked. She has learned to takes her pajamas . . . and diaper . . . off by herself, which on occasion has led to . . . well, that's another story.

I got the toddlers dressed and headed back to the kitchen to finally grab some pain reliever for my head, which was now surely grotesquely large. I went high into the cabinet and pulled down the OTC basket. Excedrin Sinus Headache . . . . Excedrin Migraine Headache . . . Excedrin Tension Headache . . . Ibuprofen . . . Tylenol . . . Alka-Seltzer . . . Vitamin C. Great! Just what I needed, choices for my head to ponder as it pounded.

I went for the Excedrin for tension . . . I didn't think it was tension, but they looked like the largest pills and I was sure that was what the Hindenberg perched atop my neck needed. My wife took the toddlers with her to Day Care and left me alone to suffer until the horse pills work their magic.

SQUAWK!

Ouch, that hurt. Our macaw wants food. Now how many of those pills did the instructions say I could take?