The Reluctant Knight. "Here I am, Lord, send me when I'm ready!"

MANILA - The Knights of Columbus is in the service of the community by being in the service of the family. Like Columbus, the Knights have to undertake the journey to discover how best to serve humanity; Columbus was wrong in theory, but he did right in practice in the end – his explorations opened the Americas to western culture. Columbus was sent on his voyage by the King and Queen of Spain, the Protestants owe the Catholics their being civilized at the start. In this modern case, the Knights have to discover more about being sent by God, such as Isaiah was, such as Joan of Arc was.

In an outing for the families of one of the registered councils of the Knights of Columbus today, Saturday, 30 April 2011, Leonardo "Nards" Lopez introduced himself to me and then began suggesting about what the Knights could do to serve the community. I don't remember him from Adam and his wife from Eve, but my wife Ampy says he and his wife Vicky belonged to ME 3 who sponsored us ME 4 and who would become members of BLD. ME is of course the Roman Catholic Marriage Encounter (mostly) for troubled couples properly married in the Church. BLD is the Bukás Loób sa Díyos Covenant Community founded by Sonny de los Reyes and wife Bai and 7 other couples in Manila on 16 April 1985 (bldworld.org).

Nards said that at our local K of C, there were plenty of doctors - the medical kind as well as the PhDs who love to be called doctors themselves - plenty of talents and experiences (and with some of them plenty of money) - that could serve the community one way or the other. Retirees and seniors have the education and the expertise that could serve members of the community - and for free.

I was all ears when Nards was discussing his ideas. Since I am a computer nerd, I was already thinking of a database of retirees and seniors that people who needed help could browse and ask for assistance via the Internet.

Ah, but Nards and I were assuming that the members of the K of C were not Reluctant Knights!

Next, Nards called somebody over to sit at our table, and then Nards began trying to convince the fellow, who happened to be the nominee for Grand Knight to accept the job and go for it. Nards probably had noticed that this was one reluctant server of the Lord. Nards was telling him that the Knights would not have nominated him for the top position if they didn't know he was qualified to occupy it.

I could see in his face and his demeanor - body language - that he was hesitant, undecided, reluctant. He was unlike Isaiah, son of Amoz, who had a vision (Isaiah 6: 8, NRSV Catholic Edition):

Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying,
"Whom shall I send, and who will go for us?"
And I said, "Here am I, send me!"

The Hebrew Bible says (Ecclesiasticus 46: 23-25): "Isaias, the holy prophet ... the great prophet, and faithful in the sight of God" (newadvent.org). According to Paul Thigpen (paulthigpen.com), Isaiah became a martyr of the church! Being faithful in the sight of God does not spare you from martyrdom.

Perhaps our Reluctant Knight was thinking that being a Grand Knight was a martyr's job, and I wouldn't blame him. The Knights of Columbus is of course a Roman Catholic organization. You know the Catholics, of course - some of the popular ones are martyrs! Do we have here a Reluctant Martyr?

Perhaps our reluctant Knight knew that "The names of the first martyrs are known only to God" (catholic.pages.com). Oh my God, so you can be a martyr and be completely forgotten! Not a welcome thought, is it?

Perhaps our Reluctant Knight was thinking of Mother Teresa as a martyr? Not your Reluctant Knight. She chose to take care of the sick and dying. What a martyr! That would be something I wouldn't do myself except to save my life.

Perhaps our Reluctant Knight was thinking of Pope John Paul II? Not your Reluctant Knight either. Someone tried to assassinate him, and he forgave the sinner. That fellow was going to assassinate a living saint! Being good is not a guarantee that someone would not make a martyr out of you.

Perhaps our Reluctant Knight remembered Joan of Arc who was burned at the stake? She saw visions; she heard voices, persistent voices. but she too was a Reluctant Knight at first. Then she became a Knight in Shining Armor, with God as her shield. She served her country, France, against British and Burgundian occupation. Not one Reluctant Knight. And then the British burned her at the stake! Working for good does not guarantee your (physical) salvation.

Perhaps our Reluctant Knight recalled that St Peter was, like Jesus, captured, imprisoned, tortured, and then crucified? He was at first your Reluctant Knight. Later, he repented and gave himself 100% to what he had to do. He had asked that a different cross be made for him so that he would be hanged upside down, for he did not believe that he deserved to die as Jesus had died, upright. Upright or upside down, when you are hung on a cross, you die a martyr.

Perhaps our Reluctant Knight was thinking of the most famous martyr of them all, Jesus the Christ of Nazareth? He was a Reluctant Knight and that was the Agony at the Garden of Gethsemane: He prayed 3 times: "Father, if it is possible, let this cup pass from me, yet not what I want but what you want" (Matthew 26: 39-44). But he had to do what he had to do. This martyr died on the cross after the agony at the Garden of Gethsemane, which was after he himself had carried that same cross to Golgotha, which was after he had been flogged for insubordination to the Roman authorities. He healed the sick, taught people to be good - and the Romans condemned him and hanged him. Blessing people does not guarantee a long life.

So, did any of these thoughts of Catholic martyrdom of Reluctant Knights and Not Reluctant Knights enter the mind of our Reluctant Knight? We don't really know. What we know is that he kept saying that he would have answered the call readily if he had retired from service. I presume that he meant he would have all the time in the world to serve the Knights of Columbus once he was retired. As in, "Here I am, Lord, send me when I'm ready!"

Not so. Nards Lopez was telling him that being a Grand Knight need not occupy all his time, that he could always delegate. In other words, if you can't do it, manage! I remember now a smart definition of management: "Getting people happily do what you happily like them to do for you." Or words to that effect.

Nards was also saying that is why he and I had been discussing what the Knights could do in terms of community service. Not what the Grand Knight could do but what could be done under his leadership. The initiative would be from us, the support would be from him.

I understand this Knight's reluctance. Why should you share your talents for free or, worse, at your own expense?! Do-good organizations like the Knights of Columbus are known for leaders who must pay as they go. Whether or not you're after prestige, you pay your way anyway.

It was about 04:00 PM when we bid goodbye our Reluctant Knight relucting. (Yes, there is such a word in the dictionary; I just checked at thefreedictionary.com, one of the wonders of the Internet at your fingertips.) Going home, on the brief ride on his car, Nards and I kept discussing about what form of community service would it take to collect the data and information on retirees and seniors who are members of the Knights of Columbus, perhaps even including their spouses, and offer to the public their talents and experiences for free. The last thing I told him was that I would package a proposal for his consideration. We parted at that.

PS: I'm glad to report that before I began writing this report, I had already written a draft of that proposal, beginning right after I got back home. I also now have a slogan attached to the conceptual framework. Watch for it! Which reminds me to tell you that I think that this goes to show that I am not a Reluctant Write. As I finish writing this, it's 09:00 PM in Manila. It is not a Reluctant Night.