The War of Words by Micheal Wells

My business partner stormed into my office the other day. His faced, flushed with beetred anger and drained from exhaustion. "On top of everything else going wrong today in the biz Michael, you will not believe the call i just got"

Before i opened my mouth (which is easy and quick for me) he shot back the answer.

"My grandson just called from the street somewhere, frantic, telling me in scattered words that he was thrown out of his tutorial class-for life. The one he needs badly to help him get through his last year of high school."

I was going to ask my partner how anyone can get thrown out of tutorial class for life, but decided it was not the time and place.

"I can not believe him Michael. You won’t believe what happened. I cannot believe what happened. I cannot believe he did what he did."

"What did he do, what did he do, was all i could blurt after my partners repeated comments.

Not hearing a word i said, he kept going. After a few more minutes of listening to him,

i noticed his voice was taking a weird tone. For a few seconds, i wasn’t sure which emotion he was feeling.

Then, I got it. My partner was indeed angry at his son, very angry, but he thought the whole episode was hilarious.

Finally, after him pacing, spewing every profane word in some dictionary, he told me the story.

His son began tutoring another student in the class when his son decided that the real tutor was doing his job. The tutor told his son several times to stop, but he didn’t.

Finally, in an explosion of emotions, his son lashed out at the tutor that included a concoction of profane words that would have silenced the crudest audience.

At this point, the tutor declared she had it with his insolence and banned him for life.

Having heard enough, and knowing my partner well, i jumped in with my comments.

I told him not what he wanted to hear.

That given similar circumstances-he would have done the same thing. He agreed and disagreed with me.

"Your right Michael, when i was his age i would have, but not know. I might think it, but I won’t say it , my partner answered honestly.

Trouble was, i reminded that his son is only 16 and long, long way until he gets to fathers age.

I wasn’t sure if my associate got the message

I was no saint, but it didn’t take a genius to recognize that if , we, as parents let the outside world dictate the dosage of profanity our kids will spew, then god help us all.

To be blunt, i told my partner, i was not surprised. "You walk all day, I said, saying almost whatever pops into your mouth, without care or respect to whom or why you are saying it."

For the first in fifteen minutes, my partner was silent. He was so silent, starring blankly at me, that it was eerie.

but i continued, undaunted.

"Our kids get more than enough profanity and violence in the music they listen too, and the videos and movies they watch. There is an ugly war of words going on out there and nobody seems to care much how often and to whom it attacks.

The War of Words is used often just to spice up the mundane every day words we use."

Now, i was on the soapbox, on the stage, I had to continue and my partner knew

it. Now I was angry and fed up with this nonsense

"And to think its small, that is somehow doesn’t matter, that its trivial compared to all the other big issues swirling around us like tornado after tornado, is sadly wrong and short sighted. "

"bottom line, like you always like to talk, you show no respect with the way you use the words that come out of your mouth, so why should your son??""

"You have given him no boundaries, and one day he is going to say these war of words to the wrong person at the wrong time, and the results will be anything but humorous..

"Like i said i am no saint, and of course i swear at time, at home and at work, but like so many social traps, i try to avoid doing it too often, and to the wrong audience-like my kids."

My partner started to get to leave. I suggested he stay a few more minutes and hear me out because i cared about him and more importantly, i cared about his son.

"Sorry to say this, but you are one of the main reasons you son was banned.

War of words generally come from impatience, anger, and not knowing a better way to deal with the situation. Like you work so hard in your business to never give up, to do the right thing, to find the way to make it work . It is even more urgent, we do the same with our kids. To try and actively discourage, not eliminate profanity.

to teach there is a time a place and unlike ice cream, the war of words is not welcomed anytime, anywhere."

I felt bad, but had to say what i said.

My partner of course agreed, but time will tell.

I know one thing is sure. If it was a problem with his biz, i know how the execution would turn out.

Michael Wells

Entrepreneur and Author of Snapshots of Heaven®

40 Funny, profound, real-life stories about children