You Could Be A Redneck If...
Judy Ramsook
July 18, 2006
Although there are many barriers that set us apart as humans, there are certain character traits, habits and lifestyle qualities that bring out the similarities in all of us. We, for instance might all be a little racist, indifferent to certain cultures and people and we all do things that we frown upon when we hear or see others performing the same actions.
In fact, sometimes this writer thinks there may be a little Redneck in all of us. So much so, that I have compiled a little list of my own Redneck type observations and experiences that I have encountered or heard of over the years. Here they are:
You might be considered a Redneck if:
You received an email from a friend or relative a couple years ago and upon encountering some one who knows the email sender, you say: Tell so and so I got his or her email but I’ve been so busy I haven’t had a chance to reply. Of course if it’s been two years, one would think the email sender has forgotten about the matter and moved on.
Your prospective date starts talking about sex before your first date takes place. Some people who are turned off by this might not allow that first date to come to its fruition.
After a couple of dates, the other party might be giving you the impression that he or she knows everything about you, when in all reality it takes much longer than that to get to know some one. Sometimes an entire lifetime even.
If you are waiting for the bus, and some one smiles flirtatiously with you as he or she comes your way, you might think he or she has a crush on you or something of that nature, when in fact all he or she wanted was to ask you for a quarter or fifty cents for bus fare.
You take too long to answer the Starbucks employee when he or she asks what size expresso you would like.
Thinking of submitting a copy of your book to the Starbucks review people so they can display it in one of their shops, but discourage yourself by thinking they might reject you since you are not a celebrity.
Looking at a computer illiterate person in shock as he or she asks you the question, how do you know how many words you have written when you write an essay, story or something of that nature.
At this point I would like to pay respects to Jeff Foxworthy and his group for bringing to light the redneck that dwells in each of us.
Regardless of race, colour, or cultural differences.
My personal favourite? When Ron White says, ‘get some one who is beautiful and intelligent to share your life with... ‘cause folks, you can’t fix stupid.’
In fact, sometimes this writer thinks there may be a little Redneck in all of us. So much so, that I have compiled a little list of my own Redneck type observations and experiences that I have encountered or heard of over the years. Here they are:
You might be considered a Redneck if:
You received an email from a friend or relative a couple years ago and upon encountering some one who knows the email sender, you say: Tell so and so I got his or her email but I’ve been so busy I haven’t had a chance to reply. Of course if it’s been two years, one would think the email sender has forgotten about the matter and moved on.
Your prospective date starts talking about sex before your first date takes place. Some people who are turned off by this might not allow that first date to come to its fruition.
After a couple of dates, the other party might be giving you the impression that he or she knows everything about you, when in all reality it takes much longer than that to get to know some one. Sometimes an entire lifetime even.
If you are waiting for the bus, and some one smiles flirtatiously with you as he or she comes your way, you might think he or she has a crush on you or something of that nature, when in fact all he or she wanted was to ask you for a quarter or fifty cents for bus fare.
You take too long to answer the Starbucks employee when he or she asks what size expresso you would like.
Thinking of submitting a copy of your book to the Starbucks review people so they can display it in one of their shops, but discourage yourself by thinking they might reject you since you are not a celebrity.
Looking at a computer illiterate person in shock as he or she asks you the question, how do you know how many words you have written when you write an essay, story or something of that nature.
At this point I would like to pay respects to Jeff Foxworthy and his group for bringing to light the redneck that dwells in each of us.
Regardless of race, colour, or cultural differences.
My personal favourite? When Ron White says, ‘get some one who is beautiful and intelligent to share your life with... ‘cause folks, you can’t fix stupid.’
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