Book Review: Growing Up Dead, The Hallucinated Confessions of a Teenage Deadhead by Peter Conners
Stuart Nachbar
June 11, 2009
When I was doing research for my novel, Defending College Heights, I found much inspiration and introspection from the counter-culture of the Sixties and the early Seventies. I even had one of my major characters, a seductive community organizer and Web master born in '67 during the Summer of Love.
I wished I had Growing Up Dead as a resource while working on my book. The Grateful Dead were an important part of the Summer of Love and Peter Conners has done a great job to tell me what it was like to go to a Dead show (they're not called concerts), and what it meant to be a Deadhead.
For some readers, Growing Up Dead may be a familiar memoir. Conners will help any Deadhead recall their own experiences: their first show, first great high, and so on. For me, this was cultural or social anthropology. Until I read this book, all I knew about the Grateful Dead was that they made tie-dyed t-shirts famous, and that they allowed fans to make bootlegged copies of their shows.
I simply wasn't part of the culture. In fact, I resented Deadheads twenty five years ago when they filled the parking lot of the Meadowlands Arena, causing me to miss the first quarter of a Giants game! Those were the Parcells Era teams that ran over everybody at the height of their powers. The Deadheads had their show at the Meadowlands, but they forced me to miss part of mine.
As I read Growing Up Dead, I could imagine me asking to tail along with some Deadheads to go to a show. And I laughed hard about it. Back in high school I was more the bookish type and I largely kept to myself. Someone like that is often the target of bullies. But I had no such problems after my freshman year in high school because I knew some Ambassadors to the Cool People. These were the folks who told the bullies to leave me alone, and got away with it. Or they told me which bullies to avoid.
Anyhow, I imagined I asked one of these Ambassadors to tell his buddies that I wanted to ride in the "bus" (Conners says it's not a van) to the Dead show. The conversation would likely go something like this.
Ambassador to the Cool People: Y'know, Stu asked if he could come with us to the show.
Deadhead 1 (looking at me in background): Huh?
ACP: Yeah, he asked. I said I'd ask you guys.
Deadhead 2: Him?
ACP: Yeah, he's all right
Deadhead 3: You're kidding, right?
ACP: Yeah, okay. I'll handle it
The Ambassador would have come back and told me there was no room on the bus--he'd share the lingo with me--one of them had a friend (or relative) who lived near the arena. I'd nod, say okay, and move on. No hurt feelings.
Years later, Conners did me a favor. He told me what it was like to be on tour and go to a show. What would I like? The caraderie, the "miracles" where someone might give you a beer or an unused ticket without asking for even a 'thank you', the freedom of being on the open road with only the show times to guide you, and quite likely some of the music. Dead musicians were inspired by folk and R&B legends, among others.
What would have scared me? The drugs. But from Conner's descriptions of shows, I could have walked in looking totally lost, but I would have fit in just fine as long as I was "properly dressed." Despite the thick glasses--technology would take care of that later--and braces on my teeth, all I'd need is an un-tucked flannel shirt, a t-shirt and torn, faded jeans
Deadheads will enjoy this book for the memories. I enjoyed it because it made me more curious as I read it. I give it thumbs-up.
Stuart Nachbar blogs on thought and fiction in education and politics at www.EducatedQuest.com. His new novel, Defending College Heights, is an investigation into the murder of a U.S. Army recruiter in a college community. Learn more at www.DefendingCollegeHeights.com
I wished I had Growing Up Dead as a resource while working on my book. The Grateful Dead were an important part of the Summer of Love and Peter Conners has done a great job to tell me what it was like to go to a Dead show (they're not called concerts), and what it meant to be a Deadhead.
For some readers, Growing Up Dead may be a familiar memoir. Conners will help any Deadhead recall their own experiences: their first show, first great high, and so on. For me, this was cultural or social anthropology. Until I read this book, all I knew about the Grateful Dead was that they made tie-dyed t-shirts famous, and that they allowed fans to make bootlegged copies of their shows.
I simply wasn't part of the culture. In fact, I resented Deadheads twenty five years ago when they filled the parking lot of the Meadowlands Arena, causing me to miss the first quarter of a Giants game! Those were the Parcells Era teams that ran over everybody at the height of their powers. The Deadheads had their show at the Meadowlands, but they forced me to miss part of mine.
As I read Growing Up Dead, I could imagine me asking to tail along with some Deadheads to go to a show. And I laughed hard about it. Back in high school I was more the bookish type and I largely kept to myself. Someone like that is often the target of bullies. But I had no such problems after my freshman year in high school because I knew some Ambassadors to the Cool People. These were the folks who told the bullies to leave me alone, and got away with it. Or they told me which bullies to avoid.
Anyhow, I imagined I asked one of these Ambassadors to tell his buddies that I wanted to ride in the "bus" (Conners says it's not a van) to the Dead show. The conversation would likely go something like this.
Ambassador to the Cool People: Y'know, Stu asked if he could come with us to the show.
Deadhead 1 (looking at me in background): Huh?
ACP: Yeah, he asked. I said I'd ask you guys.
Deadhead 2: Him?
ACP: Yeah, he's all right
Deadhead 3: You're kidding, right?
ACP: Yeah, okay. I'll handle it
The Ambassador would have come back and told me there was no room on the bus--he'd share the lingo with me--one of them had a friend (or relative) who lived near the arena. I'd nod, say okay, and move on. No hurt feelings.
Years later, Conners did me a favor. He told me what it was like to be on tour and go to a show. What would I like? The caraderie, the "miracles" where someone might give you a beer or an unused ticket without asking for even a 'thank you', the freedom of being on the open road with only the show times to guide you, and quite likely some of the music. Dead musicians were inspired by folk and R&B legends, among others.
What would have scared me? The drugs. But from Conner's descriptions of shows, I could have walked in looking totally lost, but I would have fit in just fine as long as I was "properly dressed." Despite the thick glasses--technology would take care of that later--and braces on my teeth, all I'd need is an un-tucked flannel shirt, a t-shirt and torn, faded jeans
Deadheads will enjoy this book for the memories. I enjoyed it because it made me more curious as I read it. I give it thumbs-up.
Stuart Nachbar blogs on thought and fiction in education and politics at www.EducatedQuest.com. His new novel, Defending College Heights, is an investigation into the murder of a U.S. Army recruiter in a college community. Learn more at www.DefendingCollegeHeights.com
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