Relationship Compatibility - Is He Or She The One?
Marc Sandford
March 12, 2009
Started dating someone but you aren't sure whether the person is relationship material? Perhaps there's some attraction there but how do you know if the person is compatible? If you're hoping for a relationship that will last, you'll need more than the chemistry of attraction.
The following are some compatibility indicators to be aware of when considering a future partner.
1.) Personality. Personality is a complex subject and the compatibility between the various personality types is even more complex. It isn't surprising that many people resort to astrological signs to determine compatibility. But even consulting the signs of the zodiac isn't necessary. It's much simpler to ask yourself this question: Are you always biting your tongue when you interact with this person?
Perhaps she or he is too hyperactive or maybe the person has no energy at all. Perhaps he's too much of a perfectionist or maybe she's too controlling. While the ways that different personalities can clash are endless, the point here is whether you feel stressed by your interactions.
2.) Social compatibility. If one of you is on the shy side while the other is a party animal, there is sure to be conflict further down the road. Social compatibility has a big influence on the dates that the two of you will be able to enjoy together.
It influences the amount of fun that you'll have at a party. The shy person may resent being left to fend for him or herself while the other makes new friends. The outgoing person doesn't like being held back by the needs of his or her partner.
3.) Is there agreement with regard to your beliefs and values? One person may be a passionate activist while the other wants to relax and enjoy life.
Are the two of you physical fitness fanatics or do you feel more comfortable in front of a TV all day? Perhaps you're inclined to be very deep and thoughtful about things and your partner is more action oriented. Does your partner resent you because you want to get ahead in your career?
4.) Financial compatibility. Of all of the reasons for dispute between couples, money is often the number one source of conflict. There are people who are tight with their money, while other people have a more relaxed attitude about spending. Some people are comfortable with financial uncertainty while others cannot live without financial stability.
5.) Do the two of you have similar education levels? A large disparity here leads to insecurity, resentment, and even contempt. Someone with little education may tire of hearing the 'big words' of the other person.
The person with more education may feel very limited by this. Educational differences also affect how you view the world as well as your job professions.
Although this is not a complete list of compatibilities, an incompatibility from any one of these can produce friction. On the other hand, an incompatibility doesn't mean the relationship is impossible. It simply requires a lot more diplomacy and maturity.
Separated recently? Get free advice on surviving a break up and find out if this product is worth your money - The Magic of Making Up.
The following are some compatibility indicators to be aware of when considering a future partner.
1.) Personality. Personality is a complex subject and the compatibility between the various personality types is even more complex. It isn't surprising that many people resort to astrological signs to determine compatibility. But even consulting the signs of the zodiac isn't necessary. It's much simpler to ask yourself this question: Are you always biting your tongue when you interact with this person?
Perhaps she or he is too hyperactive or maybe the person has no energy at all. Perhaps he's too much of a perfectionist or maybe she's too controlling. While the ways that different personalities can clash are endless, the point here is whether you feel stressed by your interactions.
2.) Social compatibility. If one of you is on the shy side while the other is a party animal, there is sure to be conflict further down the road. Social compatibility has a big influence on the dates that the two of you will be able to enjoy together.
It influences the amount of fun that you'll have at a party. The shy person may resent being left to fend for him or herself while the other makes new friends. The outgoing person doesn't like being held back by the needs of his or her partner.
3.) Is there agreement with regard to your beliefs and values? One person may be a passionate activist while the other wants to relax and enjoy life.
Are the two of you physical fitness fanatics or do you feel more comfortable in front of a TV all day? Perhaps you're inclined to be very deep and thoughtful about things and your partner is more action oriented. Does your partner resent you because you want to get ahead in your career?
4.) Financial compatibility. Of all of the reasons for dispute between couples, money is often the number one source of conflict. There are people who are tight with their money, while other people have a more relaxed attitude about spending. Some people are comfortable with financial uncertainty while others cannot live without financial stability.
5.) Do the two of you have similar education levels? A large disparity here leads to insecurity, resentment, and even contempt. Someone with little education may tire of hearing the 'big words' of the other person.
The person with more education may feel very limited by this. Educational differences also affect how you view the world as well as your job professions.
Although this is not a complete list of compatibilities, an incompatibility from any one of these can produce friction. On the other hand, an incompatibility doesn't mean the relationship is impossible. It simply requires a lot more diplomacy and maturity.
Separated recently? Get free advice on surviving a break up and find out if this product is worth your money - The Magic of Making Up.