Weighing in on Chocolate
Diana deRegnier
October 29, 2008
"When you're weary, feeling small, when tears are in your eyes, I will dry them all. I'm on your side when times get rough and friends just can't be found, a bite of chocolate will lay thee down," I sing in my head.
Thank goodness chocolate isn't illegal, immoral or fattening. Okay, the third is a potential if eaten in large quantities on a regular basis. Okay, so I could weigh 15, maybe 20 pounds less if I gave up chocolate -- perhaps! It depends on the replacement. There are worse things in which I might indulge.
My drug of choice is 70%, barely sweet, even sugar-free. I eat chocolate when I'm down, when I'm confused, frustrated, angry, lonely, happy, excited or proud. I reward myself, comfort myself, calm myself and energize myself with chocolate. I am a chocoholic. And, I am not even trying for recovery.
Does it affect my life? Only if I don't have any – chocolate, that is. I have not been chocolate-less since that dreadful day in 1993. Okay, I don't remember the year; it was a long time ago. I had been in bed for two days with the flu: I ached, I shook, I had a migraine, I barely had energy to feel irritable.
Moaning and muttering, I slithered out of bed and ransacked the house for emergency change: silver dollars, Kennedy half dollars, dollar bills with Santa's picture pasted over George Washington's, and even (gasp!) the uncirculated Susan B. Anthony dollars I bought in support of recognition of important women in history. Sweating viral toxins as I searched, too weak and unfocused to shower, dress and drive, I contemplated how much it could possibly cost to send a taxi to the market for a bag of chocolate chips.
In the end, I wore myself out with the search and argument that the plan was a bit over the top. I made it through the night wrapped in layers of blankets, staring at the Rorschach lion's head in the wood grain on the closet door and watching escapism television.
Some months after the dark day of chocolate deprivation, a pharmacy consultant prescribed magnesium to prevent migraines. Unexpectedly, I found myself not dipping into the bittersweet chips as often as usual. Now, I keep magnesium beside too, though I haven't attempted larger doses to completely eliminate the craving because, frankly, I don't want to cure my addiction.
Chocolate, anywhere, is like a night on the town. The occasion and my wallet dictate how richly I pamper: Straight from the oven, flourless, dark chocolate soufflé with a molten hot center oozing like lava from a volcano for the ultimate experience; bite-size candy bars for ah-indulgence and let-me-get-through-one-more-hour incidents.
Chocolate does invite an occasional dip into immorality. In the week I visited my sister in Des Moines, Jan and I went to the original Baker´s Square, the nationally renowned pie restaurant, three times. On our last stop before the airport, the manager treated me to a piece of their special creation to eat on the plane. They describe the European Truffle pie as "Sinfully rich, with a dark chocolate cookie crumb crust, a layer of chocolate ganache, our dark chocolate silk filling and topped with chocolate whipped cream and chocolate curls." With guilty pleasure, ignoring 167 mouth-watering passengers, I stuffed myself silly, and even decadently enjoyed the flight attendant´s exclamation of envy as I licked the last morsel from the corner of my mouth.
I redeem myself pondering chocolate's numerous benefits:
1. Chocolate entices me to read and educate myself on its nutritional merits.
2. Antioxidants in chocolate make it good for you – in moderation. Andrew Weil and Deepak Chopra say so, and I believe most everything they say!
3. Chocolate inspires gratitude for its evocative fragrance, delectable taste and the Zen-like loving state of euphoria that follows consumption.
4. Sometimes it even rouses me to acceptance of life as it is.
5. And, finally, chocolate inspires what is for me a rare prayer: "Thank God, I'm not allergic!"
Diana deRegnier writes from the San Francisco Bay Area. Her articles can be found in numerous sites, wires and print publications around the world. © Diana deRegnier 2008
Thank goodness chocolate isn't illegal, immoral or fattening. Okay, the third is a potential if eaten in large quantities on a regular basis. Okay, so I could weigh 15, maybe 20 pounds less if I gave up chocolate -- perhaps! It depends on the replacement. There are worse things in which I might indulge.
My drug of choice is 70%, barely sweet, even sugar-free. I eat chocolate when I'm down, when I'm confused, frustrated, angry, lonely, happy, excited or proud. I reward myself, comfort myself, calm myself and energize myself with chocolate. I am a chocoholic. And, I am not even trying for recovery.
Does it affect my life? Only if I don't have any – chocolate, that is. I have not been chocolate-less since that dreadful day in 1993. Okay, I don't remember the year; it was a long time ago. I had been in bed for two days with the flu: I ached, I shook, I had a migraine, I barely had energy to feel irritable.
Moaning and muttering, I slithered out of bed and ransacked the house for emergency change: silver dollars, Kennedy half dollars, dollar bills with Santa's picture pasted over George Washington's, and even (gasp!) the uncirculated Susan B. Anthony dollars I bought in support of recognition of important women in history. Sweating viral toxins as I searched, too weak and unfocused to shower, dress and drive, I contemplated how much it could possibly cost to send a taxi to the market for a bag of chocolate chips.
In the end, I wore myself out with the search and argument that the plan was a bit over the top. I made it through the night wrapped in layers of blankets, staring at the Rorschach lion's head in the wood grain on the closet door and watching escapism television.
Some months after the dark day of chocolate deprivation, a pharmacy consultant prescribed magnesium to prevent migraines. Unexpectedly, I found myself not dipping into the bittersweet chips as often as usual. Now, I keep magnesium beside too, though I haven't attempted larger doses to completely eliminate the craving because, frankly, I don't want to cure my addiction.
Chocolate, anywhere, is like a night on the town. The occasion and my wallet dictate how richly I pamper: Straight from the oven, flourless, dark chocolate soufflé with a molten hot center oozing like lava from a volcano for the ultimate experience; bite-size candy bars for ah-indulgence and let-me-get-through-one-more-hour incidents.
Chocolate does invite an occasional dip into immorality. In the week I visited my sister in Des Moines, Jan and I went to the original Baker´s Square, the nationally renowned pie restaurant, three times. On our last stop before the airport, the manager treated me to a piece of their special creation to eat on the plane. They describe the European Truffle pie as "Sinfully rich, with a dark chocolate cookie crumb crust, a layer of chocolate ganache, our dark chocolate silk filling and topped with chocolate whipped cream and chocolate curls." With guilty pleasure, ignoring 167 mouth-watering passengers, I stuffed myself silly, and even decadently enjoyed the flight attendant´s exclamation of envy as I licked the last morsel from the corner of my mouth.
I redeem myself pondering chocolate's numerous benefits:
1. Chocolate entices me to read and educate myself on its nutritional merits.
2. Antioxidants in chocolate make it good for you – in moderation. Andrew Weil and Deepak Chopra say so, and I believe most everything they say!
3. Chocolate inspires gratitude for its evocative fragrance, delectable taste and the Zen-like loving state of euphoria that follows consumption.
4. Sometimes it even rouses me to acceptance of life as it is.
5. And, finally, chocolate inspires what is for me a rare prayer: "Thank God, I'm not allergic!"
Diana deRegnier writes from the San Francisco Bay Area. Her articles can be found in numerous sites, wires and print publications around the world. © Diana deRegnier 2008