Time Traveler Visits Coffee Shop
Christopher L. Vaughn
June 21, 2007
A time traveler from the year 1885 arrives in a new and unusual land called Seattle; the year 2007.
He walks to the first sign he can recognize, something Coffee with a mermaid picture. He figures it’s a coffee house for sailors and enters.
Inside, the time traveler sees the odd people of the future standing in lines and talking to them selves,
Yeah, I know, uhuh, mmm, okay I’ll see you at 10, goodbye.”
Sitting a tables, he sees people looking at strange glowing boxes like zombies, in the corner he witnesses two men holding hands, in another corner he sees someone reading a paper with a picture of a women in little clothing.
Finally, he reaches the counter and asks for a medium coffee. The worker looks at the time traveler annoyed, then says, “we don’t have medium, would you like a grande drip?”
Confused, the time traveler just says, ”I’ll have what the person in front of me had please.”
The worker turns to another worker behind the counter and says,
Can I get a quadruple shot, Ethiopian dark, Venti, organic soy, triple crunch chocolate brownie cappuccino, extra hot…..no wait, ummmm……..133 degrees, 1 pump white chocolate, 1 pump cinnamon, non-dairy sugar free whipped cream, upside down double blended, with a caramel swirl, and a cinnamon twist on the side?”
The time traveler leaves and returns to his machine thinking to him self, “what happened to coffee? Did humans go crazy and forget how to make coffee over time? Or did coffee make humans go mad? Just to be safe, I better not drink this.”
Okay, obviously I’m poking fun at today’s society and how obserd some people are when it comes to ordering a cup of coffee. But, do we really need “tall” when we mean small, or “vente” when we mean medium? And what’s with those people who order a pastry that contains 3,000 calories and then order sugar free whipped cream?
He walks to the first sign he can recognize, something Coffee with a mermaid picture. He figures it’s a coffee house for sailors and enters.
Inside, the time traveler sees the odd people of the future standing in lines and talking to them selves,
Yeah, I know, uhuh, mmm, okay I’ll see you at 10, goodbye.”
Sitting a tables, he sees people looking at strange glowing boxes like zombies, in the corner he witnesses two men holding hands, in another corner he sees someone reading a paper with a picture of a women in little clothing.
Finally, he reaches the counter and asks for a medium coffee. The worker looks at the time traveler annoyed, then says, “we don’t have medium, would you like a grande drip?”
Confused, the time traveler just says, ”I’ll have what the person in front of me had please.”
The worker turns to another worker behind the counter and says,
Can I get a quadruple shot, Ethiopian dark, Venti, organic soy, triple crunch chocolate brownie cappuccino, extra hot…..no wait, ummmm……..133 degrees, 1 pump white chocolate, 1 pump cinnamon, non-dairy sugar free whipped cream, upside down double blended, with a caramel swirl, and a cinnamon twist on the side?”
The time traveler leaves and returns to his machine thinking to him self, “what happened to coffee? Did humans go crazy and forget how to make coffee over time? Or did coffee make humans go mad? Just to be safe, I better not drink this.”
Okay, obviously I’m poking fun at today’s society and how obserd some people are when it comes to ordering a cup of coffee. But, do we really need “tall” when we mean small, or “vente” when we mean medium? And what’s with those people who order a pastry that contains 3,000 calories and then order sugar free whipped cream?