Killer Greenhouse Gas Source Revealed by University of Kentucky federal study, Its hog manure!
Mark Lowry
March 29, 2007
McClatchy Newspaper leader the Herald Leader reported in their March 28, 2007 issue great news the federal government has finally recognized one of the great causes of global warming and is attacking it with millions of dollars to research the problem further. The University of Kentucky has been awarded a $500,000 federal grant to study hog manure and see if they can come up with a way to control the smell and reduce the greenhouse gas effect of the feces used as fertilizer.
Washington heard Al Gore’s plea for help in saving the planet from the threat of global warming and climate change. The federal grant research machine is busy cranking out millions for this critical issue to define a way to eliminate the serious hog shit threat to planet earth. Kentucky is leading the fight in this very important war against global warming, and climate change. The federal "manure studies" are about to begin.
The University of Kentucky, the Kentucky’s flagship institution of higher learning was in competition for the coveted Federal hog studies with 9 other institutions of higher learning. U.K. won the much sought after grant money, after thousands of dollars were spent on research grant applications that defined the University of Kentucky’s capable ability to master the problem of hog manure and its green house gas emissions. The entire state of Kentucky is so full of hog and other types of manure deposited by its illustrious politicians the state was a natural for the illustrious award.
Kentucky has a long history of dealing with classy horse manure the wealthy horse farmers give to the state at a rather high price, but well worth it. We are happy to pay for the Thoroughbred Industry’s Horse Manure at exorbitant prices just to be able to glow in the shine of their phenomenal wealth. We poor Kentuckians are truly blessed.
The old saying: “UK, UK, UK where students go in dumb and come out that way” has never meant more to citizens of the state. All Kentuckians everywhere can hold their heads a little higher knowing our great state is finally getting academic recognition it so desperately deserves.
The global warming crisis Al Gore and the Algorhythms warned us about has been granted the funding for research by one of the top 20 research schools on the hog manure subject in the nation, maybe the world, the University of Kentucky. After years of debate, millions spent on scientific analysis and review, the learned institution University of Kentucky has come to the conclusion: hog manure is a major cause of not only dangerous greenhouse gas, global warming and disastrous climate change that threatens planet earth and all human kind, but it is also a major source of bad odors. Hog manure stinks!!!!!!
Kentuckians and alumni of the University of Kentucky, a venerated institution of higher learning (only last year, the basketball school of the world) have progressed in the world of global warming science. And now the old alma mater has earned the reputation of being the premier public university in HOG MANURE STUDIES. We Kentuckians are all so proud.
Federal grant money is flowing in for this critical research. The government has finally recognized the threat to our safety is not dreaded catastrophic diseases like cancer, heart, diabetes, Parkinson’s or a plethora of other killer diseases; it is not from terroism or illegal alien invasion; it is not being overweight or use of illegal drugs, smoking or drinking; the real threat to mankind is hog manure.
This appears to be a golden opportunity for Kentucky and the University of Kentucky (one of the highest priced schools in the country but last in all other academic standards), to excel in research and compete with other great institutions of research like Podunk Hollar Scool of Lerning, down in western Kentucky.
There seems to be a lot of jealously brewing from schools like Harvard, Princeton, and Yale who were beaten out in fierce competition for the federal manure research grant. They must recognize, hog manure is a specialty field that takes years of dedicated study and research to master. Novice hog manure schools did not have a chance against the great state of Kentucky and its University.
Citizens, around the state are excited, radio talk shows, television reporters every where you go people are basking in the glory of being one of the first states to jump on the hog manure band wagon and feed at the government trough of federal global warming research grants. We hope to expand, small at first with maybe only a building or two devoted to the science of hog manure, but then we may be able to set up an entire premiere school for hog manure studies and prepare a curriculum for graduate studies.
None of this would have been possible with out the great scientific effort by Al Gore and phenomenal algorhythms on global warming he came up with all by himself. He is such a super scientist.
We can all sleep a little easier tonight knowing this critical global warming problem is finally getting respect and taxpayer dollars needed to resolve the issue once and for all. We may be able to save planet earth by mixing mulch in with hog manure.
America is finally on the right path in the battle to the bottom. We will spare no expense to end the threat of hog manure and destroy all credibility we may have. We must all sacrifice to save planet earth.
And they say our institutions of higher learning are not teaching our children anything, that is just plain hogwash.
Washington heard Al Gore’s plea for help in saving the planet from the threat of global warming and climate change. The federal grant research machine is busy cranking out millions for this critical issue to define a way to eliminate the serious hog shit threat to planet earth. Kentucky is leading the fight in this very important war against global warming, and climate change. The federal "manure studies" are about to begin.
The University of Kentucky, the Kentucky’s flagship institution of higher learning was in competition for the coveted Federal hog studies with 9 other institutions of higher learning. U.K. won the much sought after grant money, after thousands of dollars were spent on research grant applications that defined the University of Kentucky’s capable ability to master the problem of hog manure and its green house gas emissions. The entire state of Kentucky is so full of hog and other types of manure deposited by its illustrious politicians the state was a natural for the illustrious award.
Kentucky has a long history of dealing with classy horse manure the wealthy horse farmers give to the state at a rather high price, but well worth it. We are happy to pay for the Thoroughbred Industry’s Horse Manure at exorbitant prices just to be able to glow in the shine of their phenomenal wealth. We poor Kentuckians are truly blessed.
The old saying: “UK, UK, UK where students go in dumb and come out that way” has never meant more to citizens of the state. All Kentuckians everywhere can hold their heads a little higher knowing our great state is finally getting academic recognition it so desperately deserves.
The global warming crisis Al Gore and the Algorhythms warned us about has been granted the funding for research by one of the top 20 research schools on the hog manure subject in the nation, maybe the world, the University of Kentucky. After years of debate, millions spent on scientific analysis and review, the learned institution University of Kentucky has come to the conclusion: hog manure is a major cause of not only dangerous greenhouse gas, global warming and disastrous climate change that threatens planet earth and all human kind, but it is also a major source of bad odors. Hog manure stinks!!!!!!
Kentuckians and alumni of the University of Kentucky, a venerated institution of higher learning (only last year, the basketball school of the world) have progressed in the world of global warming science. And now the old alma mater has earned the reputation of being the premier public university in HOG MANURE STUDIES. We Kentuckians are all so proud.
Federal grant money is flowing in for this critical research. The government has finally recognized the threat to our safety is not dreaded catastrophic diseases like cancer, heart, diabetes, Parkinson’s or a plethora of other killer diseases; it is not from terroism or illegal alien invasion; it is not being overweight or use of illegal drugs, smoking or drinking; the real threat to mankind is hog manure.
This appears to be a golden opportunity for Kentucky and the University of Kentucky (one of the highest priced schools in the country but last in all other academic standards), to excel in research and compete with other great institutions of research like Podunk Hollar Scool of Lerning, down in western Kentucky.
There seems to be a lot of jealously brewing from schools like Harvard, Princeton, and Yale who were beaten out in fierce competition for the federal manure research grant. They must recognize, hog manure is a specialty field that takes years of dedicated study and research to master. Novice hog manure schools did not have a chance against the great state of Kentucky and its University.
Citizens, around the state are excited, radio talk shows, television reporters every where you go people are basking in the glory of being one of the first states to jump on the hog manure band wagon and feed at the government trough of federal global warming research grants. We hope to expand, small at first with maybe only a building or two devoted to the science of hog manure, but then we may be able to set up an entire premiere school for hog manure studies and prepare a curriculum for graduate studies.
None of this would have been possible with out the great scientific effort by Al Gore and phenomenal algorhythms on global warming he came up with all by himself. He is such a super scientist.
We can all sleep a little easier tonight knowing this critical global warming problem is finally getting respect and taxpayer dollars needed to resolve the issue once and for all. We may be able to save planet earth by mixing mulch in with hog manure.
America is finally on the right path in the battle to the bottom. We will spare no expense to end the threat of hog manure and destroy all credibility we may have. We must all sacrifice to save planet earth.
And they say our institutions of higher learning are not teaching our children anything, that is just plain hogwash.